...this blog is DONE!
No, I'm not giving up...I'm MOVING!
A friend recently turned me on to a simply AWESOME web site called SparkPeople (www.sparkpeople.com). I spend a lot of time there now, and members can create their own blogs. So I'm moving my writing there.
I hope you will join me there. Here is a link to my page:
http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage.asp?id=JUDIESZYD
Thank you.
Friday, December 4, 2009
Monday, November 9, 2009
What comes first...the mood or the food? (Part 3)
Read from Part 1
So I was all set to write about how I now have a canister of chocolate in my freezer, and how I can have a single piece with my coffee and enjoy it and not have it constantly, lovingly calling me to it from that dark cold place...wait...what was I saying?
OK, so I might not have this thing completely figured out. But here's what I do know is true, for sure, for me:
1. When I eat carbs late at night, I have trouble sleeping.
2. When I have had a bad night's sleep, I tend to overeat, especially carbs and sugar.
3. When I eat carbs and don't burn them off with exercise, all I want is more carbs to eat.
4. When I drink a lot of diet pop, I crave sugar.
5. When I do overeat, it is not because I am weak or lazy or bad or a failure.
6. Food affects my mood.
There is absolutely no doubt that my emotional state has improved dramatically since I started exercising and eating better. Situations that used to set me off are no big deal (most of the time). People who annoy me still annoy me, but I can take things in stride (most of the time). And while I do eat well most of the time, when I don't - like today when one piece of chocolate from my stash turned into many - I don't beat myself up about it. I do what I can to slow the tide, wait to eat until I get physically hungry again, and move forward.
Right now I've got healthy chicken breasts baking in the oven, I am drinking my water and my gear is already laid out for my early morning workout. That's moving forward.
Let's face it...food is pleasurable. It is meant to fuel our bodies and be enjoyed in moderation. Decades of dieting had turned my relationship with food into a perpetual battleground. It doesn't really matter what comes first - the mood or the food. What matters is breaking the cycle so food once again becomes what it was intended to be.
Keep trying until you figure out what works for you.
So I was all set to write about how I now have a canister of chocolate in my freezer, and how I can have a single piece with my coffee and enjoy it and not have it constantly, lovingly calling me to it from that dark cold place...wait...what was I saying?
OK, so I might not have this thing completely figured out. But here's what I do know is true, for sure, for me:
1. When I eat carbs late at night, I have trouble sleeping.
2. When I have had a bad night's sleep, I tend to overeat, especially carbs and sugar.
3. When I eat carbs and don't burn them off with exercise, all I want is more carbs to eat.
4. When I drink a lot of diet pop, I crave sugar.
5. When I do overeat, it is not because I am weak or lazy or bad or a failure.
6. Food affects my mood.
There is absolutely no doubt that my emotional state has improved dramatically since I started exercising and eating better. Situations that used to set me off are no big deal (most of the time). People who annoy me still annoy me, but I can take things in stride (most of the time). And while I do eat well most of the time, when I don't - like today when one piece of chocolate from my stash turned into many - I don't beat myself up about it. I do what I can to slow the tide, wait to eat until I get physically hungry again, and move forward.
Right now I've got healthy chicken breasts baking in the oven, I am drinking my water and my gear is already laid out for my early morning workout. That's moving forward.
Let's face it...food is pleasurable. It is meant to fuel our bodies and be enjoyed in moderation. Decades of dieting had turned my relationship with food into a perpetual battleground. It doesn't really matter what comes first - the mood or the food. What matters is breaking the cycle so food once again becomes what it was intended to be.
Keep trying until you figure out what works for you.
Wednesday, November 4, 2009
What comes first...the mood or the food? (Part 2)
Read Part I
What I don't remember about the Great Donut Incident of 1984 is what I ate the night before, how I had slept, or even what the heck was so aggravating to me that morning. If had I arrived at work at 8:00 in a good mood, having had a good night's sleep and perhaps a decent breakfast, what could possibly have happened in one hour to turn me into a raving psycho eating machine?
A recent incident really got me thinking about the mood/food cycle. A few months ago I had a one of those life-changing decisions to make. It seemed to be the right time for me to overcome my fears (some of them admittedly irrational) and purchase a home. I was working against some emotional issues as well as the practical ones - the economy, the burst housing bubble, job security. For several weeks I wasn't sleeping well, I wasn't working out much and my eating was way off track.
After my first attempt at a purchase fell through, it was as if all my fears were justified. Emotionally, I took a huge step backwards. And for several days I indulged my cravings for sugar and carbs. I was convinced that my place was in renterville and always would be. But at some point I started to calm down, eat better, exercise more and finally got some better sleep.
And then one Thursday morning, after a particularly intense early workout, I was suddenly and supremely confident that it was time to move forward again. The practical considerations had not changed one bit, but my fear was completely gone! Before lunch time I had an appointment with the realtor, and in less than a week I had seen seven places, made two offers and signed a purchase contract for the place I am writing from now.
If I could bottle and sell the feeling I had that Thursday morning, I would be a gazillionaire!
(continued)
What I don't remember about the Great Donut Incident of 1984 is what I ate the night before, how I had slept, or even what the heck was so aggravating to me that morning. If had I arrived at work at 8:00 in a good mood, having had a good night's sleep and perhaps a decent breakfast, what could possibly have happened in one hour to turn me into a raving psycho eating machine?
A recent incident really got me thinking about the mood/food cycle. A few months ago I had a one of those life-changing decisions to make. It seemed to be the right time for me to overcome my fears (some of them admittedly irrational) and purchase a home. I was working against some emotional issues as well as the practical ones - the economy, the burst housing bubble, job security. For several weeks I wasn't sleeping well, I wasn't working out much and my eating was way off track.
After my first attempt at a purchase fell through, it was as if all my fears were justified. Emotionally, I took a huge step backwards. And for several days I indulged my cravings for sugar and carbs. I was convinced that my place was in renterville and always would be. But at some point I started to calm down, eat better, exercise more and finally got some better sleep.
And then one Thursday morning, after a particularly intense early workout, I was suddenly and supremely confident that it was time to move forward again. The practical considerations had not changed one bit, but my fear was completely gone! Before lunch time I had an appointment with the realtor, and in less than a week I had seen seven places, made two offers and signed a purchase contract for the place I am writing from now.
If I could bottle and sell the feeling I had that Thursday morning, I would be a gazillionaire!
(continued)
Sunday, November 1, 2009
What comes first...the mood or the food?
In my never-ending quest to figure out this food thing, I have come to realize that I may have had it backwards all along.
I have always been a moody person. We're talking serious mood shifts, sometimes from hour to hour. Just ask my friend and co-worker Stuart who, in an act of self-preservation, made a sign for my cubicle so I could warn whoever approached what they were in for:
The mouth part was actually a wheel behind the face part that I could turn to indicate my mood. Stu's a clever guy, but a so-so artist (he got the brows right, but my nose is nowhere near that big).
A sad or worse mood was most often "treated" with food. I remember one incident from very early in my career when I was so aggravated by 9:00 that I left the office, went to the convenience store, purchased a box of those big chocolate donuts and ate every one of them in the car before returning to the office.
And guess what? It calmed me down. I was able to go back to work and be productive, at least until the sugar crash came later. But what a cost for that mood fix - 2400 calories, 160 grams of fat and 136 grams of sugar in about 20 minutes. (Yes, they still sell those donuts and kindly provide that "nutrition" information on their web site.)
So it's no surprise I that my weight continued to climb. The last year on that job I put on 100 pounds. And that was the last year because I was fired - specifically because of my erratic moods. I was trapped in a vicious cycle of "emotions-food-emotions" that has haunted me to various degrees for over 20 years.
But what if the cycle is actually "FOOD-emotions-FOOD"?
(continued)
I have always been a moody person. We're talking serious mood shifts, sometimes from hour to hour. Just ask my friend and co-worker Stuart who, in an act of self-preservation, made a sign for my cubicle so I could warn whoever approached what they were in for:
The mouth part was actually a wheel behind the face part that I could turn to indicate my mood. Stu's a clever guy, but a so-so artist (he got the brows right, but my nose is nowhere near that big).
A sad or worse mood was most often "treated" with food. I remember one incident from very early in my career when I was so aggravated by 9:00 that I left the office, went to the convenience store, purchased a box of those big chocolate donuts and ate every one of them in the car before returning to the office.
And guess what? It calmed me down. I was able to go back to work and be productive, at least until the sugar crash came later. But what a cost for that mood fix - 2400 calories, 160 grams of fat and 136 grams of sugar in about 20 minutes. (Yes, they still sell those donuts and kindly provide that "nutrition" information on their web site.)
So it's no surprise I that my weight continued to climb. The last year on that job I put on 100 pounds. And that was the last year because I was fired - specifically because of my erratic moods. I was trapped in a vicious cycle of "emotions-food-emotions" that has haunted me to various degrees for over 20 years.
But what if the cycle is actually "FOOD-emotions-FOOD"?
(continued)
Monday, October 26, 2009
Contest results and what really matters
So I'm finally sitting down to post the final results of the gym contest, and I can't find my record! Since I last posted I have bought a condo and moved. My contest booklet is around here somewhere...and if I ever find it I'll let you know the specifics.
But the contest ended pretty much where I was last time I posted about it. I had a big weight loss in the first four weeks (15 pounds), then I stalled. Food-wise, that is. I never stopped working out, although I had to cut my sessions with the trainer down to once a week due to budget constraints (the condo purchase mentioned above). There are reasons for what happened, but none of them rise to the level of excuses (remind me to write about the difference).
The good news is that I haven't given up, and I never will. Right now I'm at a decades-low weight of 245, am back up to two training sessions a week plus two or three workouts on my own, and most days the food part (still low carb) is going well. Oh, and as a result of participating and winning my category at my gym branch, they added three free months to my membership!
My next big goal is the wall. I'm going to climb the wall at the gym. My trainer says we can start that attempt after I get below 200 pounds. And although I want to reach that goal before my 50th birthday, it doesn't really matter when it happens, as long as I keep going.
The thing about climbing is that you plan your route as best you can with the knowledge you have, but rarely (if ever) do you get to the top without changing course. You make progress by moving upward, and then maybe to this side or other other, and often by going backwards before moving forward again.
Just like life.
But the contest ended pretty much where I was last time I posted about it. I had a big weight loss in the first four weeks (15 pounds), then I stalled. Food-wise, that is. I never stopped working out, although I had to cut my sessions with the trainer down to once a week due to budget constraints (the condo purchase mentioned above). There are reasons for what happened, but none of them rise to the level of excuses (remind me to write about the difference).
The good news is that I haven't given up, and I never will. Right now I'm at a decades-low weight of 245, am back up to two training sessions a week plus two or three workouts on my own, and most days the food part (still low carb) is going well. Oh, and as a result of participating and winning my category at my gym branch, they added three free months to my membership!
My next big goal is the wall. I'm going to climb the wall at the gym. My trainer says we can start that attempt after I get below 200 pounds. And although I want to reach that goal before my 50th birthday, it doesn't really matter when it happens, as long as I keep going.
The thing about climbing is that you plan your route as best you can with the knowledge you have, but rarely (if ever) do you get to the top without changing course. You make progress by moving upward, and then maybe to this side or other other, and often by going backwards before moving forward again.
Just like life.
Thursday, July 2, 2009
These are the numbers we want to be BIG
Body weight, body fat percentage, body part measurements...those numbers we want to get smaller. Equipment weights, timed exercises, reps (and my bowling average)...we want those numbers to get bigger.
My trainer said I should blog this, cause it's a big deal:
This morning I did barbell squats - 145 pounds - ten reps.
Not that I don't think it's a big deal, but I don't pay close attention to those numbers. He keeps track of it, and I just do what he tells me to do (as much as I can). If I looked at the weights on the machines too closely I might freak out. Like when he put the leg press at 200+ and told me to do one leg at a time. I knew he was nuts, but I tried it anyway.
Because some days, I discover I can do even more than he thinks I can. And those are the days we both smile.
So there you are, Mr. Trainer. Hey...we never settled on a nickname for you...I have some ideas.
My trainer said I should blog this, cause it's a big deal:
This morning I did barbell squats - 145 pounds - ten reps.
Not that I don't think it's a big deal, but I don't pay close attention to those numbers. He keeps track of it, and I just do what he tells me to do (as much as I can). If I looked at the weights on the machines too closely I might freak out. Like when he put the leg press at 200+ and told me to do one leg at a time. I knew he was nuts, but I tried it anyway.
Because some days, I discover I can do even more than he thinks I can. And those are the days we both smile.
So there you are, Mr. Trainer. Hey...we never settled on a nickname for you...I have some ideas.
Wednesday, July 1, 2009
One pound from the lead
I've lost 13 pounds in the first four weeks of the gym contest. The leader (at our location) has lost 14 pounds. They won't tell us who it is, but I know it's another woman. I'm in the running!
Last week I sort of got burned out. Not sure but I might have actually been fighting off some kind of bug. I was completely drained (and a little nauseous) on Saturday, and for the first time I cancelled a training session at the last minute (which I still feel bad about...but it was the right call). By Monday I was feeling better and found myself full of energy which is still with me. In fact, today I even worked out TWICE - once in the morning and again tonight after my other plans fell through. And I did a personal best on the rowing machine - 1000 meters in 4:34!
I've never been a very competitive person, and I don't think it is really the money that is driving me (although it would be nice). I JUST WANT TO WIN THIS THING!!!
Seven and a half weeks to go.
Last week I sort of got burned out. Not sure but I might have actually been fighting off some kind of bug. I was completely drained (and a little nauseous) on Saturday, and for the first time I cancelled a training session at the last minute (which I still feel bad about...but it was the right call). By Monday I was feeling better and found myself full of energy which is still with me. In fact, today I even worked out TWICE - once in the morning and again tonight after my other plans fell through. And I did a personal best on the rowing machine - 1000 meters in 4:34!
I've never been a very competitive person, and I don't think it is really the money that is driving me (although it would be nice). I JUST WANT TO WIN THIS THING!!!
Seven and a half weeks to go.
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